Well, I started this journal so I suppose I should post another entry. But what a difference a week can make when you are walking with the Lord! There seems to be so many more urgent matters going on that make my small journey seem not quite so important to write about. Today I’ve taken down all those beautiful, comforting sympathy cards sent to me that have adorned my fireplace mantel for the past month or more. I greatly appreciated them, but I’m ready to move on. It’s a new day!
I cannot in all honesty sit here and write about my “Journey of Grief” as though it were consuming me. In doing so, I selfishly make it more significant than anyone else’s situation, or more vital than anything else going on. I am okay. Or, at least I will be. I know that. Yes, I do realize that everyone deals with grief differently and everyone cannot just “get over” it. I know that everyone cannot always quickly shrug off whatever their struggle might be at the moment. And I also know that there are still many things for me to deal with concerning my mom’s Estate and in doing so there may be times that I will sense sadness, pressure and irritation. I might even consider writing about it or telling someone about it. But I do not want to be someone who is a moaner or whiner, forever so disabled by grief and despair that I incessantly share with the world my misery on every anniversary of my mother’s death or birth date. For me personally, I want to change my mindset…no, I have to change. I have the mind of Christ, and therefore, I should not allow any thought or thing to rise up and try to exalt itself above the knowledge of God! Yes, I am human and will have my moments. But I also have the DNA of Christ coursing through my veins and He pulls me out of the pit and the miry clay every time I call out His name!!! JESUS!!!! THAT NAME ABOVE ALL NAMES!!!!
As I’m still in a skirmish with this crud, which now includes a slight case of vertigo, I’m shouting that Name alot here lately whilst I ingest my second round of antibiotics. However, after receiving extraordinary revelation over the weekend and then while sharing this revelation with a dear friend and talking through it, I realized that this stuff that is trying so vehemently to pull my body down into the muck and mire is not just about me. Feeling I was on the mend, my husband and I went to a meeting at our church Saturday night, including the Sunday morning service and fellowship after. I am forever changed by the message God brought forth from the mouth of our guest speaker!!! And of course, while trying to apply this revelation in a practical way to my life and walk it out by faith, the enemy throws this crud right back in my face! Isn’t that just like him? But I’ve got news for that sneaky, lying coward…I AM A BLOOD BOUGHT CHILD OF THE MOST HIGH KING AND WILL NOT BE INTIMIDATED OR TRICKED BY his RIDICULOUS SHENANIGANS!!!! YOU HAVE BEEN EXPOSED, devil, AND I AM RESISTING YOU, SO you MUST FLEE!!!!
Since I am an intercessor and am often led to pray about the events occurring in the world, I feel sure that God has shown me that this illness affecting my body is a prophetic sign of the topsy-turvy (vertigo), clogged-up (congestion) state of the world, and as well, that there are infected components trying to inflict the Body of Christ. I need to refocus, because I have some intercession to do! You see, there are things lining up all around the world that are prophechies coming to pass before our eyes, and right now so much is happening so quickly that will bring it all together and to a head. Many things are diversions for something else going on that will blow up in our faces if we are not focused and have pin-point precision in our prayer times. The Body of Christ – the Bride of Christ, should not be limping around in tattered wedding attire always looking for someone to help us mend ourselves. We should know who we are by this time and know that as a blood-bought bride we are made whole by that blood Jesus shed 2,000 years ago! He came so that we would be whole, not so that we would keep going back time and again asking for prayer for the same old things, always being immersed in our problems, keeping our focus on ourselves rather than paying attention to what is going on all around us. We are becoming like Chirst, that is why He came. In becoming like Christ, we should be ministers of His love. We should be givers of hope to the world rather than needful of ministry every time we fall down and skin our knee. Now that’s not being calloused toward those who genuinely have need for prayer. But why can’t we get prayer, receive it and be done with it? Or better yet, why can’t we believe who we are, not what our circumstances dictate?! What will the world do when they are seeking answers while everything they thought they knew to be true is imploding, if we, the Bride of Christ are still hobbling around like wounded warriors wishing He would hurry up and come back and take us away from all of this? Really?! WE HAVE A PURPOSE AND A DESTINY – RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW!!! Let us finally be able to walk in wholeness to fulfill that purpose!!!
Okay, so that is my soapbox from the revelation I’ve received. I’m still walking it out by faith, too. So I promise I’m not trying to be critical. Just being real. I know there are those who need prayer from time to time, and those who need to be comforted and encouraged. Even me. But I have joy, I have light, I have hope, I have destiny, I have Christ in me!!!! I’m ready to start acting like it!!! Who’s with me?